Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
