Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
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