Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize