am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
