Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
