Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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