Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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