I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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