Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
i wish my penis had a tongue
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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