You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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