I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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