hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
