Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
