Welp...herpes.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
