How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
