Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
