glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
