I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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