Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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