I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Randomize
