If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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