think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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