spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
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