I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
