If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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