You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
