saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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