Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
