Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
