wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
