accomplished twins. life is a go
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize