you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Randomize
