NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Randomize
