I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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