Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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