Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
