i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i just had sex bonerless
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
