He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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