I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
