He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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