I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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