In the future we'll all be gay
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
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