I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I think I sprained my soul last night
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
