margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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