Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
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