if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
