you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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