Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
