I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
