We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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